It's Over
What a season! The past few weeks have been a bit chaotic as we’ve attended more weddings in the last 8 weeks than we have in the last 8 years. Let me be clear—I’m not complaining. We have some amazing friends and have been honoured to partake in their big days. A special and final shout out to the Webbs, Sullivans, Gillorans, and Briscoes. We created so many wonderful memories and significantly improved our dancing skills. In fact, an alter ego has emerged which Maggie has dubbed “DJ Euro Tom.” As I reflect on the strobe lights and fog machines, I figured I’d create the ultimate guide to wedding dancing.
Beginner
The Bob. Give your C1-C7 some action and get the synovial fluid pumping to the beat. If you’re feeling a little more aggressive throw in a front to back movement with your feet. Step to the left and carry your other foot behind you. This is a great way to subtly include yourself into the funitivites without drawing too much attention to yourself. If you have a healthy patch of lettuce up top, don’t be shy about a blatant headbanging session.
Finger Snap. Pretty self-explanatory but certainly a crowd pleaser. The Carlton variation is a crowd-pleaser and is essentially “The Bob” with an effervescent finger snap thrown in the mixer.
Tube Man. Ever seen a used car dealership balloon man? Imagine all of your bones in your body have lost their rigidity and you’re completely made of Jell-O. A variation of this is the Bernie where you flail around like Tube Man but do so in motion—bring the legs into play even though you give the appearance of a tripped-out zombie.
Intermediate
High Kicks. Beware of your surroundings... Bring your left foot to right hand and then find your right foot to your left hand. Watch the hammies and let her fly. For extra points, try to go over the top of the head to let people know you came to play.
Pike. Check for moisture on the floor. I’ve seen this one go south in a hurry. If you’re in the middle of the circle throw in a couple back to backs and envision you’re a fish out of water.
Rock Star Kick. Focus on the extension of the supporting hand to the invisible guitar neck. Drive your feet into the ground and slam your six-string hard whilst in the air. Super critical to pantomime the hell out of this.
Advanced
DJ Euro Tom. The key to this move is understanding the knobs in front of you which require twisting, the incessant support of your headphones against your ears and the sliding knobs that need to move up and down. Don’t make the rookie mistake of scratching too much—this will throw your audience. Lastly, make sure you slowly raise your arms as the beat nears a crescendo and go sicko mode when it finally drops. Works best to Avicii’s Levels.